ok what is  it with people and thinking they can just grab ur wrists and look at ur cuts? Since when cant u ask? I mean r u sure I want you to see them if u noticed them oh well theres nothing i can do about that but to just grab someones arm and looking at it... thats just so inconsiderate...

on a better note...

Ignoring Nate has accomplished much... He has looked at me constantly... every time i look he is....

My mom had a meeting with my phyciatrist yesterday and sayed I am "very extremely depressed" and "I am very unhappy living there"... SURPRISE!!!! they DIDNT believe me but what are they gonna say to that! And I cant wait to tell em how my parents make fun of my depression and cutting! haha! see who gets to a phyc ward! I'm sorry but that will be the HAPPIEST day of my life! and my mom DID say if the phyciatrist said it'd be best that I move down to Texas! I better start packing now! wooooooooooooo! Life might actually be turning around!

BTW the new Slipknot song rules the fucking world! That is one of the BEST songs I have ever heard (talking about Duality) and their new masks KICK ASS!!!!

and today Nate looked at me and I paid no attention to him... and his friend (when Nate wasnt there) was checking me out! and I was just like how u doing...

omg Nate looks soooooooooooo gorgous.... his hair is long and swept all in his face and u can only see 1 and half eye... his smile is soooooooo cute too!

And everyone looks so pretty well.... all my friends are who i'm talking about i didnt really look or care much for the others...Stephanie,Mabel, Tonya, Alicia, Kristin, Kortney, Sam, Cassandra, Ashlee, Brittany, Kristy, Trista, all of them

And Fred, He looked depressed... IDK... Btw I havent talked about him in awhile... He got sent away for stealing over 1000 dollars and hes in a boys juviniele hall and he came back only for school and Joel dumped him for another guy, cuz like i said before and I'll say again shes a piece of trash, w/e...

...but here i am! I havent really felt like updating these past couple weeks... hmm... what is so exciting in life nemore... I'm so worn out...

I cant stand living in this hell hole also known as my house... my mom read my poems and my diary while cleaning my room... what a bitch and then told my dad what i said... Like how i wish she'd drop dead and how i wish my dad would fuck off.... so fucking what! I can write my god damn thoughts when i want to and i did expect to be private... I THOUGHT my mom would just leave it be and not read it... but noooooo.... she didnt... and she saw the NEW cuts and flipped her shit and callled me phyco and stuff.... real supportive right???? and my dad was making fun off me he was like back in my day we didnt cut ourself it hurts! we got cut walking through the thorn bushes on our way to school... and all this other shit that made me do it AGAIN... fuckers... I cant stand them... hopefully my psyciatrist(IDK how to spell it) will say its best for me to go down to Texas for a while... so I cane be HAPPY... I forgot that meaning totally....

Btw read this song by Nine Inch Nails....

"Hurt"

I hurt myself today
to see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
the only thing that's real
the needle tears a hole
the old familiar sting
try to kill it all away
but I remember everything

what have I become?
my sweetest friend
everyone I know
goes away in the end
you could have it all
my empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

I wear this crown of shit
upon my liar's chair
full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
beneath the stains of time
the feeling disappear
you are someone else
I am still right here

what have I become?
my sweetest friend
everyone I know
goes away in the end

you could have it all
my empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt
if I could start again
a million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way

Well, my mom tried killing herself... twice yesterday cuz my dad left us but he came back yesterday and i think its my fault in a way... if i havent tried killing myself numerous times or threatened to kill myself she would have never gotten the idea...

And I think its my self Megan's is more like me in a way... I rubbed it on her... but i hope she understands I'll always be there for her and I would give up this life in an instant if she did anything...

OMG!!!! MY AUNT AND UNCLE ARE BEST FRIENDS WITH AUTO FUCKING(not part of the name)  Cool is that!!!! IM GETTING FREE MERCH. AND NOT TO MENTION, YOU READY FOR THIS..... FREE WARPED TOUR TICKETS!!!!

How sick is that!

neways I am so glad i gott to talk to megan yesterday! and the day before!

btw my new sn is KillHannah924

^^^thats right representing KH!!!

Just when you have A good day something has to trip you and make you fall down on ur face...

Kristin said that she thinks Nate IS going out with that girl...Ugly ugly Emma... shes taller than he is and kinda fat esp compared to him.... its disgusting.... w/e everyone can tell I am really pissed off right now....

Courtney asked me whats wrong but I didnt want to talk about it.... Corutneys really cool.... She likes all the bands I like and she also cuts herself....

*sigh*... Mr.Mann's gone... Yesterday was his last day... but i did hear he's signing substitute teacher applications... Yesterday I gave him a paper with a pic of him the one where hes singing and playing guitar and he's all sweaty and red and had people sign it... well people put (including me) UR HOTT, I WANT U,Ur sexy, and Korynn joking around put ur yummy i want to eat you call me and put her number... haha and Ryan put r u a virgin? jeez... and when he saw the pic he yelled WHOA!!! where'd u get that!?! and I told him an old moneybagsgram website, and he was like I didnt relize how sweaty i was til now... It was like 98 degrees... we were in Indiana, i think... and he read it when i stayed after and i asked him what he thought about some of the comments on there and he was like yah... some of those can get me arrested... people leaving their numbers and stuff... and he was smiling and laughing, he said thank you a million times and when I left he was like Kylie... Thank oyu again, I really appreciate it... and in my head i was like I love u!!! but i just smiled and said ur wlecome... Nate stayed after and threw water balloons at him with his friends... they are all friends... Everyone says Nate is gunna look like Mr.Mann when he is older... god that'd be so hott! I've have'nt been paying much attention to Nate lately... on purpose... I'm friendly with all his friends though... Shane (his friend.... mad cool) and I played (well I attempted) hackysack and we started to talk about Nate and he was impersonating Nate... cuz Nate does this one voice its like a groan, like caveman, and he talks all wierd examples Nate pick up Kristins cat and well be like Ohhh...kee kee... or when they had chicken he was like mmm chick chick.... and Shane was acting like him, it was funny....

and I science we r disecting a fetal pig and I am in Dennis' group ( another one of Nates friends) and we were gunna unravel the large intestines and jump rope but it wouldnt work and he makes the pig dance and he'll put it peoples face and be like how ya doing and he gets into a surgeon mode... fun fun fun...

Wanna know what i relized ALL the guys I like are in a chain in 7th I liked Matt whos brother Dan, I also had a crush on  is friends with Mr.Mann and Mr.Mann is friends with Hunter who I also had a crush on in 7th who is friends with Dustin who is friends with Glenn (very short crush) who hangs out with Nate... haha....

well.... right now Nates right there! idk how long he's been there but hes there...

um... my parents finally found out about my cutting... damn... I was removing furnature from my room and dad was helping me and he was like whats on ur wrists! and oh god i just wanted to shoot myself there and i said I accidently got cut.... yeah several times... and he was like i know lieing and he was like why would u do that and I was like i dont do  it nemore (lie)... and my mom was like let me see ur arms! and I showed them to her and walked to the house thinking omg omg omg omg... and she was like whatcha do it with... and I told her just to leave me alone.... maybe this will show them to STOP BEING ASSHOLES.... idk...

I got the Blindside cd yesterday! weeeeeeeeeeeeee! GC was SUPPOSED to BE ON PUNKD but were they NOOOOOOOO!!!! damn previews making me all excited.... maybe next week like an error or something....

btw TOMORROWS Mr.MANNS LAST DAY!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!OO!OO!!!!!!!!!!!!

ok... well u all know i am inlove with Nate... hah.... and I guess their only friends but he was walking with his arm locked with this one girl.... I got really mad and upset and its bugging me right now... MAKE ME FEEL BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

btw here are some music videos I recommend...

http://launch.yahoo.com/musicvideos/lists/byalpha.asp?l=B&p=18

ALL THE BLINDSIDE ONES ESP PITIFUL!!!!!!!!!!

http://search.launch.yahoo.com/search/lsearch/video?p=AFI

^^^^3rd Season Days of Phoenix